Friend Zoned

I found this Valentine’s Day card in the hallway of my dorm at Purdue University.

Valentine

I found this note and thought it was absolutely hilarious. I thought I’d pass it on to you.

Shh My Ass

Love (or friendship) note left beneath my windshield wiper; my name’s not Maria but my license plate frame says “I’m a librarian and I will shush your ass.” Maria must be pretty awesome since the author says there should be “1 million more of her.” On the other hand, the author wasn’t sure if Maria … Continued

But If I Were

I found this note and thought it was absolutely hilarious. I thought I’d pass it on to you.

Unrequited Love

I found this gem while I was on a walk during my lunch hour. It raises a few assumptions about Jack: -He is about 8 or 9 years old -His target is either devastated at losing her first love note or possibly indifferent at the loss -I think it is statistically probable that the love … Continued

Heart Receipt

I work valet at the U of M hospital. I found this in the parking lot of the emergency room. I’m pretty sure it came from an ambulance. Haven’t seen one before or since.

Lost Love

Found lying on the sidewalk. It had been duct-taped to a pole like many others in the neighborhood. I don’t know if he ever found love again. So it goes.

Damaged Heart

Found in a box full of fire damaged goods donated to Goodwill. In 1992, there was a fire at my apartment. Everything was damaged, and I gave it all to Goodwill to see if they could salvage anything. Years later, in 1999, after going through four peoples’ hands, a friend of mine showed me this … Continued

You Da Best, Miss U.S.A.

Found on the subway. So many things to ponder here: the use of a half of a paper with a pixilated wreath on the back, the date written at the top (the first World Trade Center bombing), the gentle script.