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October 02, 2008 |
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Dear Andrew
FOUND by Abi and Elaine
in Pomona College
My roommate found this note tucked into a used book from the college bookstore. Pretty intense.
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
Today's theme: notes with good margins.
This looks like your standard tale of the angst of teenage love. If this keeps up we'll see her, with both Joe and Chris, on Jerry Springer someday.
What does it mean to feel $0 nervous? I've never put a price on my nerves.
why do we only get parts?... i wanna know what was before the p.s :(
it's always nice to give ones spouse express written permission to walk all over you.
Point One: both my previous partners were horrible in bed= you're the only one I've ever enjoyed sleeping with.
Point Two: feel free to cheat on me to confirm if I'm a comparatively decent lay.
Point Three: your happiness is the only one that matters in this relationship.
how could this possibly go wrong for her?
oooh, the $ is intriguing. Star, we get only scraps because is Found. You have to draw your own. (and make it vivid!)
".. with both Joe and Chris.. I didn't enjoy myself.."
Well? did you at LEAST enjoy Joe? Chris? (I enjoyed Joe. Chris could use some practice.)
Best. Girlfriend. Ever.
Maybe a three$ome isn't her thing. Maybe ju$t Joe by him$elf. Maybe ju$t Chri$. Maybe there $houldn't be any ca$h changing hand$.
--wait a minute -- @here I am anticipated my comment -- never mind
How about this:
this puts a different spin on that "let's just be friends" kind of note, doesn't it?
And I'm wondering what her basis is for determining that she is "good". I mean if "both Joe and Chris ... sucked really bad" AND she didn't enjoy herself, then how in the world does she know she's all that "good" herself??
Surely not just because "both Joe and Chris" told her so while they were sucking [her] really bad[ly].
"You can have ME anytime you want, AND you can have anyone ELSE anytime you want, because I just want you to be happy."
This makes me sad for this girl. I hope she ended up getting some self-respect at some point in her life.
She should give Carl and Ike another chance.
I think I will soon see the note writer, the boyfried, Joe, and Chris on Jerry Springer. I bet it's Joe's baby.
Jerry! Jerry!
Oh good grief! The sentiments of this note are much too immature for the acts that have been implied... And as young as the handwriting appears, it's disgusting to think of what the writer may have experienced at that age.
JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY
eh she sounds desperate....giving him what he wants, to date other girls then when he's done with them and can't find another girl to date he can come back to her
Who in the hell is Andrew?
Hooray! A find we can all peaceably agree is awesome!
Would she have enjoyed it if they had sucked really well?
'If you need to be with another girl to know I'm good' ... er, no, I don't think so. It doesn't work like that.
@A girl in a cube, I think you may be reading too much into this. Despite my ribald comments above, this may be about no more than holding hands. I'd guess the writer is about 14 at most?
lawndude: Hilarious.
JodaBabes: Good question. Kind of like this one:
http://www.foundmagazine.com/comments/765
(See my comment at the bottom.)
Good question JodaBabes.
Can you imagine the conversation prior to this note: "I think you may actually be a really shit lover, but I have no basis for comparison, so I reckon I should go fuck a few other girls, coz you've been with other boys and fairs fair, coz if you are crap then I don't want to be with you." How on earth would you survive that? However much you know he's an arse hole, that's gotta hurt.
There must be another side to this note that we're going to see in another few weeks. They must have referenced "Andrew" on the other side.
I agree, Jonathan. It doesn't work like that and she'll realize that when he continues to cheat on her long after the "experiment" is over.
so like, yeah.. did he tell her that he wouldn't do her because he heard she sucked in the sack (and not "sucked" in the GOOD way)?
Did he TELL her that he needs to boink someone else, as a basis for comparison? And Neon Green PostIt chick FELL for that line?
Oh My.
Wow! What a note! Well I think if you need to "compare" to see if someone is good they are not that good lol
If your toes curl... lol jk
P.S Chris and Joe didn't do it for me either, but John on the other hand..... lol jk
So I don't think she's that young bc the note was found 'tucked into a used book from the college bookstore'. She's at least 18 then...
And the way I read this was that she might have cheated on him with these 2 guys (b/c she wanted to find out if Andrew was really good?) and now she's using that card on him too...
I do have a friend who lost her virginity to a guy and although she would always say he was awesome, she wanted to know if there was more to it or if she just thought it was good for lack of experience...
@Monkey - I couldn't agree more. That is my exact analysis of this note.
I don't know why all of you are judging her.
Jeez, let the girl live her life.
If she wants Andrew to do that, then so be it.
Not that I would allow that with my boyfriend, but I've known various girls in my college that would do that.
=0D
So, Gentleman Joe sucks in bed? That's going in the 'pro' column under 'hottt'
This is taking competitive sex to the next level. It's like the sexolympics! Joe and Chris got bronze and silver, but only after shameful losses, but the boyfriend gets THE GOLD. Our author here, sure of her prowess, doesn't mind the competition.
And yes, I would question the meeting of minimum age requirements with these kids as well.
"But, I never, ever flashed anyone in my life."
...am I seriously the only one who read this thinking it was a girl talking to another girl about their first sexual experience together and the *very first* lesbian experience for recipient of this sticky note? Now I see the way the rest of you saw it, but...
Shit. I really *am* a closet lesbian!
It may be because I'm "down under" but I read this note as one "almost" lesbian to another "almost" lesbian. In that she has slept with Chris and Joe (girls?) and they sucked really bad ... now she wants to sleep with this other hot girl, but she understands that the hot girl may want to sleep with other hot girls to see if this dependant, sheep-like girl is "good" or not. I think I need coffee ...
Cowering ... snap! Love the use of "sticky note" - I'd have thought of that, if only I had had coffee!
I think this is a girl, writing to her girlfriend. She is talking about her straight experiences, and how her new girlfriend perhaps needs to be with another girl to realise that she is a lesbian/bi too. She thinks sex with boys makes her awkward and nervous, maybe she told her girl she had always been gay and is justifying her past.....
But if she's a lesbian, why does it say Dear Andrew??
JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
$0 nervous.
Have a nice day!
P.S. with both Joe and Chris I didn't enjoy myself....but I did enjoy it with Mike and Steve and Jake and....
I think the line through the "s" in "so nervous" was actually the beginning of the n in nervous but she decided to make is so nervous instead of just nervous. Still with me?
This girl has some self-esteem issues.
I was really confused about this too, but I agree with darkshines and cowering, that's what immediately came to my mind first... I was going for the "you're better than any of my previous bf's" but it almost sounds like she's consoling a girl who perhaps was confused, and had a first lesbian encounter with her.
I think that she's probably cheated on her boyfriend with Joe and Chris, is now telling her boyfriend it wasn't all that good anyway and is worried he's going to leave her so she's saying "fine, fuck someone else, when you know how good I am you will come back"
My read: She tried a "threesome" with Joe and Chris, and didn't like it. They sucked (for whatever reason). Maybe they needed to be stoned.
Anyway, she is writing to another guy, who has been given permission to be with another girl.
Whatever.
No hot lesbian action here, IMHO.
On to whatever Found has for us tomorrow.
It makes me sad, but I think Holley in Sydney is right.
And it looks like such young handwriting to have so much experience.
Well, who said it was all about you?
You may not have enjoyed yourself, but the question is: Did Chris and Joe enjoy themselves?
HAHAHA. What a dumb note.
Whoever wrote it will look back in 10 years and wonder what they were thinking.
I'm with "Cowering..."
A totally flat-cocker note, all the way.
aaah karaoke i get it :)
right then, maybe....the writer is a guy, who had a fling with joe and chris, but then started having a thing with andrew who used to be andrea and isnt sure if he likes man bits or women bits, and the writer decided to be real bitchy with the 'another girl' snipe?...
or else it's just another case of teens not old or mature enough to make these decisions being thrust into the adult world..
Where in the h-e-double-hockey-sticks are you guys reading "Dear Andrew"? I'm SO confused...
Wow, both nervous AND uneasy at the same time. Sounds intense.
@ COWERING- YES!!! I got the feeling that the author is just now realizing that she might be into *girls*?
I'm in agreeance with you...totally.
The author is a lesbian and she's letting her lover know that he guys did not turn her crank.
Not that there's anything wrong with that....
Just a little worry on the lesbian issue... how many women do you know called andrew?.. :s