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June 04, 2008 |
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I Will Not Be Your Rebound.
FOUND by Alais
in Wellington, New Zealand
FOUND at a local cafe. It was tucked underneath the sugar bowl.
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Life, Living Of: July 21, 2002 |
Fat Dog July 25, 2004 |
Two Things November 20, 2005 |
Cat in a Box May 20, 2006 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
I think someone needs to stop confusing him/her. You're there, but you're not, you love thm but you're not a rebound. I mean the person just broke up, let them heal!
Yeah, the last thing this person might not want is another relationship.
Rebounds usually don't work, either.
"I will not be your rebound."
Yeah, right.
Those skinny blue hearts are pathetic, and she needs an apostrophe in *it's*.
"HER" sounds mean...some jealous person
Found in Wellington, eh? Those V-like symbols on the first and last lines must be boomerangs from nearby Australia. The writer obviously thinks someone it going to turn around and come back. But is it "HER" or "you" or whom?
Maybe this note was never delivered... the person wrote, realized it was too confusing or decided not to share their feelings, and left it under a sugar bowl.
Wait a sec! When I first read this I thought that the note's writer had just broken up with "HER." But as I was posting my first comment it suddenly seemed clearer that the note's intended recipient had just broken up with "HER."
It sort of bothers me, too, that the writer uses all those pronouns. It's just not personal enough. Any of you send me a note like this, use my name and sign your name. Otherwise it could be anyone's note to anyone.
Just a question... the timestamp for these comments... what timezone* is this good for? It's about 7:35 where I am.
*also, is timezone one word or two?
@Corey, re timezone, as best I can tell from the timestamp on my post on the previous find, the time reflects Mountain Daylight Time. The Offical Found Magazine Clock seems to have been off for a couple of weeks or so.
@Librarian, my take on this note is the it was written by a guy, addressed to a girl who just broke up with a girl, hence the ending question, "Do you think its [sic] possible?"
..I never allowed myself to love you... but I still love you.. do you think it's possible?
I'm in the Pacific Time Zone, and the time stamp clock is about an hour and ten min ahead of my local time.
They used to post the fresh Finds at 10 PM Pacific (1AM Eastern), but for a while, they've been showing up after 11 Pacific. I'm not allowed to stay up that late.
I never really paid attention to the date/time stamp until someone else mentioned it. Surprisingly, it still doesn't bother me that much. I post. My post shows up. it's all good. I guess it would matter if I needed precise, concise records of my postings at Found to stand up on a court of law, before a jury of my peers (I HAVE no peers), but until then, I'm a-0k.
What a crock! The writer (love) obviously would happily become the rebound of the recipient 'you'.
Be honest with yourself (love).
The blue things are seagulls.
I think this is just wishful writing...I don't think it was sent either. I also agree...let the person heal. If one were to send a letter like the one above to someone who is getting over a breakup than expect TO BE THE REBOUND! What is the saying...patience is a virtue.
Way to get your foot in the door, babe.
lol@seagulls
For the record, I married my rebound boyfriend, and we've been married for almost 15 years now!
DON'T GIVE UP HOPE!
Hey, Corey--On the Find titled 'I Made Chili and Made Too Much' (#2643 from Jan 17, 2008) Jason answered the time stamp question in the comments section. This is what he said:
"Finds are posted at 1am eastern time. And I have NO IDEA why we set it up that way. We were probably drunk.
The time stamp on the comments seems to be for the central time zone. Again, no idea why. Maybe it's a tip of the hat to Chicago, the birthplace of FOUND"
Not sure if this still holds true.
Corey, I'm pretty sure the time stamp part is no longer correct. I just posted the above response and the actual time was 8:34am CST.
In case you're wondering the comment counter doesn't seem to work either.
Aren't these lyrics to a song?
(*yeah, but the comment counter has NEVER worked!* It always catches up to itself later, though. I think.)
Those hearts definitely look cold, anemic, and loveless. Look out, You- the author of the note's just looking for that vengeful breakup/rebound sex.
When I was 24, my best friend of 12 years left her husband. I cried when she told me. She thought I was crying for her. I was crying because somewhere along the way I had stopped being her best friend and started really caring for him. I didn't realize it until she told me she was leaving him and I was more concerned about him than I was about her. A year later I married him and we have been together for 22 years. Rebound relationships are fine with me.
@Nightingale--I thought the exact same thing! "Just to let you know, I want to put my name in the running for your love" sort of thing....But you never know, as evidenced above, stranger things have happened. Sometimes, rebounds DO work out. Either that, or I am a hopeless romantic and seriously deluded.
I married my "rebound", too, and it's been 28 years.
Seriously, since she left the note under the sugar bowl, I am guessing it's not possible.
It's hopeless. Can't she see that "he's just not that into you"?
Looking back, it just seems to make sense. He was a nicer guy. I fell in love with someone i lusted for, instead. I still have the lust, but the loneliness makes me cry.
@Wishing, that's just about the saddest thing I've heard...Niceness is a highly overlooked quality when you're young. It tends to be the breeding ground for lust the older you get, IMO.
I think the reason for all the pronouns is pretty clear. I write notes like this all the time to sort out my own feelings, but never really intend to send them. Even the last line is a question, seemingly posed more to the writer than the possible recipient. The names could be left out because the writer is ashamed of her own feelings. She leaves the note in a cafe on the off chance that "you" may find it and never really know for sure if the note was written for him (or her?)
seems like perfect rebound material to me !!
I split up from my boyfriend of three years in February. He has just told me he has bought an engagement ring for his new girlfriend. haha, reboundtastic!
Great. Now I have a Journey song playing in my head.
Can someone make it stop? Please?
Wouldn't the letter-writer be the person in search of a re-bound since THEY'RE the ones that just ended a relationship???
Overall I think it's just too unsure and low self assurance for me. The guy needs to stand up and speak soundly and confidently, not be all questioning and self doubting, asking the girl to reassure him.
Hey brain problem situation,
How does a little Foreigner grab ya? "I wanna know what love is *ding ding ding ding* I want you to show meeee...."
Here's another one to pollute your head with.
In David Gate's high pitched - sincere - girly voice:
"If a picture paints a thousand words
Then why can't I paint you
The words will never show
The you I've come to know"
Cue the strings and quiet sobbing.
'Do you think it's possible?'
No.
Assuming the writer is a 'she', she is going about it the wrong way. What he needs is a non-judg(en)mental Best Friend with all thoughts of love firmly off-limits. Then it may blossom of itself.
Unless he's an immature romantic sap who doesn't really know what he wants, in which case he might fall for this (as I probably would), as it's very flattering to be 'loved', however much the same stuff has just messed up your life.
Who knows.
Actually, reading it again, I think there's quite a lot of game-playing going on. The capital letters, the '(love)' in brackets, the coy dot-dot-dots...
'And now that's over...' (I just want to rip your clothes off, heh heh)
But what's with the 'To you'? Surely this person deserves a name, at least. Unless the writer is covering her ass in case it's not really over and the note is found by 'HER', in which case the writer can deny all knowledge and pretend it was meant for someone else.
Perhaps that's what happened, which would explain why it got hastily shoved under the sugar bowl.
Again, who knows.
@freonz ... you could be correct about the genders involved, but when I looked at it again, I couldn't really tell. Could be almost any combination, except for the former girlfriend/lover. I'm thinking now that the former girlfriend/lover could even have been hooked up with the writer (as long as the note's recipient could have to 'get over' the fact that the writer and his/her girl broke up).
Actually, an interesting note, isn't it?
"I'll be your crying shoulder
I won't be your rebound,
But I will be here when you are over her,
Cuz I still love you
Is it possible?"
blah blah blah
(I am ready to puke my lunch)
Helloooo people! The timestamp is supposed to be central time, but we had to restart the server last week and I think it goofed things up. Blurg. Is that throwing people off?
And regarding the comment counter, it actually works quite well, in theory. <nerd>But the front page of the site is cached and is rebuilt every fifteen minutes or so-- meaning the counter catches up to an accurate number four times each hour. We have to cache the page so the server doesn't have to "think" each time a person checks the site- i.e. it reduces the load on the processor.</nerd>
That's the explanation, wish you didn't have to notice things are wonky, but glad you keep coming back.
"I never meant to be so bad to you.
One thing i said that i would never do.
A look from you and i would fall from grace, and that would wipe that smile right from your faace.
Do you remember when we used to dance, and incidents arose from circumstance? What were those things you wanted for yourself? Teenage ambitions you remember well...
It was the heat of the moment, telling you what your heart meant. It was the heat of the moment, shown in your eyes.
And now find yourself in '82. those disco hot spots hold no charm for you. you can't concern your self with bigger things, you catch the pearl and ride the dragons wings.
It was the heat of the moment, telling you what your heart meant. It was the heat of the moment, shown in your eyes.
And when your looks are gone and you're alone. how many nights you'd sit beside the phone....."
Asia haunts my dreams.
and whomever wrote this needs to bring his douchebaggery quotient down a couple of notches. "HER" may not have been an issue if this guy owned his feelings.
I find this sad. Having been there and 'loved' friends and seeing them with other people it is hard, but then this letter doesn't seem to be one that she ever intended on giving to the guy. (I'm going with the heterosexual relationships here...the hearts look female, and too female to be gay) I think she'd better keep quiet or else she could loose her friendship and her love. But true love cannot be formed before a relationship. That burning love that eats away at you is not sustainable....
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I get it now! The letter-writer is a female, writing to a male that USED to have a girlfriend, but just broke up. The writer needs to let him know her feelings, but doesn't want to be the rebound.
Geez. I thought it was a guy, writing to a girl he had longed for while in a relationship.
Wake up Christina!
This is so sweet. My boyfriend and I were the exact same way. It's like one of those Made of Honor things- he was with her for a few years and I was always "the best friend" who never made moves on him- just stood by and watched him get his heart broken. She finally left and we've been together ever since. I hope the same love we have to this mystery couple. LOVE conquers all.
Today's finds are the Yin and Yang of the Found universe.
Jason, timestamp schwinestamp... it's all just numbers any way. Who's to say what time it really is anyway? Don't fret 'bout it because we aren't. (My own nerdiness just makes me notice things like that.)
As to the sex* of the writer: I have no supporting data other than personal experience but this handwriting looks to be the work of a male - at least to me.
*People have a sex, words have a gender.
I loved him before they were over. & when he turned to me, I believed in those eyes. I have the gall of being broken by his deception.
I think You should probably stay the he#$ away from that passive-aggressive heart person!
The all-caps line - how it is phrased and written - seems to me a huge warning sign indicating an unpleasant aspect of heart person's personality.
Mitch Daniels screwed with our time zone when he became governor. I'll never forgive him for that. So don't ask me about time... I just rant and rave.
The found is sad. I think it's written by a stringy haired teenager, full of angst, to someone she has loved from afar. Probably a popular football hero type of guy. It'll never work. Those hearts are just too wishy-washy.
I never made wishy-washy hearts, even when I knew for sure what time it was.
we have Tim zones in canada.
@Mona -- Tim zones (heeheeheehee) that's good. (I live in Michigan now, so I get it).
Got any Timbits? I'm hungry and oatmeal is boring (and I'm too lazy to get up and go all the way to the kitchen and heat it up, blahblahblah).
Thanks for the giggles.
I think this is a male who just got out of a relationship with 'HER'. He denied any feelings towards the female recipient but i believe she was hurt by him and his relationship with 'HER'. So after the recipient gets over him they can try if 'its possible'. because he realizes he loves her. The writer is the one rebounding seems like.
When I read it, I also got that it was a male who had just gotten out of a relationship with the said "HER".. and was no longer in love with her. So now he was ready to love someone else.
But he's being too picky in thinking he has in any say in whether he's a rebound or not, after treating a girl like she was second best.
He doesn't deserve the chance!
That's kind of how I felt about my boyfriend at one point. But I wasn't sad enough to write it down in a note... and also I didn't realise how pathetic it was until I saw this... Ew... I feel a little bad for (love) though. It's tough.
every relationship is a rebound relationship
because in order to get over someone
you have to get under someone else
pukeko, you are so noble and lovely i am happy to know you:)
i wonder what cafe? i'll bet deluxe cause it's my favorite