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May 12, 2008 |
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Donovan
FOUND by Chris
in Near my office, Texas
Donovan must have done something...
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
I really wish I knew what Donovan did at the Circle K.
The word "twit" is a poor choice, in my opinion.
Also, the writer has severe upper case cursive D issues.
Looks like the note is on accounting paper. Maybe someone 'cooked the books' at the Circle K. The writer must be looking for more of whatever Donavan did; the 'test me' is underlined so much it reads like a dare. Test me Donovan! Test me!
All the ex-cons hanging out in all the Circle-Ks everywhere are ineveitably headed back to stir anyway, whether they pull that shit again or not. They can't help it. It's genetic.
Donovan's no exception. Trying to warn him is pointless. He'll never listen.
is it me or is this just one huge cliche?
ok...write on the freaking lines. i haven't even read it yet.... i hate it when people write across the lines.
Lars. it is, just one cliche after another...
and what's a circle K?
Nightingale, i think "you stupid f**k" would have been better.
"Circle K" used to be the college-level affiliate of the Kiwanis Club service organization. What are they doing letting in parole violators?
And why doesn't Donovan deserve a whole piece of paper for this note? Or was what he did [again!] so very bad?
Why wait? Call the probation officer now! Donovan obviously has not learned his lesson.
Circle K is a convenience store/gas station.
Circle K is a convenience store, like 7-11.
Donovan will do it again, just call.
I'm kind of imagining Michael Palin as the Monty Python lumberjack, trying very hard to be American and angry, but words fail him (because he's too nice) and the worst thing he can call his victim is 'you little twit'...
Oh phooey! Bother! Blow!
Or maybe it's Basil Fawlty trying to tell off Manuel for getting the dinner orders wrong again.
('But Mizza Fawltee! I know notheeng!')
Obviously, Donovan was being irresponsible with his phone booth/time machine on loan from George Carlin again.
Let's not cross the writer of this letter...they seem to be pretty ruthless.
Service club ... Service station ... Gas station ... Convenience store ... I'm guessing Donovan followed the same downward path.
Donovan? From singing "They Call Me Mellow Yellow" to selling Mellow Yellow in the local convenience store. How far the great have come.
I'd better stop free-associating (was Donovan free-basing?) and get back to work.
The snippet under the title is beautiful in its simplicity: Donovan must have done something.
Strange things afoot at the Circle K!
The Circle K is obviously a dude ranch somewhere in Texas, and Donovan is a cowboy/outlaw always living on the edge of lawlessness.
Equally likely is the possibilty of a previously unreported scandal involving the quarterback for the Philadelphia Eagles and/or the guy who sang "Mellow Yellow."
HAIL ATLANTIS!
Who is testing whom? That is the question.
Great find!
Awww, I forgot Circle K was a convenience store. I preferred to picture a seedy western bar.
I would bet money that he shoplifted.
Nah Marie, he just acted up in the parking lot.
Pepper, stop it. Act like an adult, please.
I'm sorry.
This was so a note passed in math class.
Look its on graph paper and they work twit and not a bad word so if the teacher did find it they wouldn't be in extra trouble.
If that be the case, then why say shit?
I was really confused about this until I read the comments... I know circle K as the university level of Kiwanis, so convenience store makes a lot more sense. I wonder what was done to end up in prison to begin with?
Hahaha the answer for the spam protection is "420"
Kait, that's not graph paper, that's ledger paper, what people used to use to keep track of accounts payable and receivable, lists of expenses and and income, basically. Bookkeepers used this before they had computer programs. (Do they still use ledger books like this? I don't know.)
And I'm not positive, but if a student has a parole officer, I don't think the teacher's gonna give a rat's ass about a kid's naughty language. (This did not come from a school!)
I detest their handwriting. It is very awkward and hard to read.
For some reason this entire find just annoyed me. The handwriting, writing against the printed lines, trying to sound like a strict parent, empty threats, etc. I resorted back to being a teenager, inwardly rolling my eyes at an angry parent.
Donovan knows they will never call the parole officer, that's why he can get away with this. If they were the type of person to call, they would have done it the night before, not write it as a threat in a letter the next day.
Probably not a lot of Donovans in prison, I would guess.
HaHa @ Ted. As soon as I read the Circle K, I also thought something strange was afoot. Perhaps Donovan got mixed up in a wacky Bill & Ted debacle involving a slurpee machine and Ghengis Kan.... ?
Why wait for the Donovan's next crime to call the parole officer? Donovan's actions at the circle K were obviously bad enough to warrant considering making the phone call right then. No one had the nuggets to deal with the situation. Now Donovan knows he can try whatever it was he did again. Probably get away with it (again) too. This is why we have criminals on the street and at places like Circle K.
"I will call your parole officer so fast that ... that ... that ..." come on now, Donovan-hater, you have soooo left me hanging here! "That your head will spin, you little twit" is like something a sputtering villain in a '60s-era cartoon would bark out at Dudley Dooright -- it's hardly the dozens-level insult I'd expect from a parole-officer-calling Circle K customer. Let's help him out here, Founders; finish this sentence properly:
"If you ever pull that shit again with me like you did last night at the Circle K I will call your parole officer so fast that ..."
"If you ever pull that shit again with me like you did last night at the Circle K I will call your parole officer so fast that ..."
... your ass will light on fire.
" if you ever pull that shit again with me like you did last night at the Circle K, I will call your parole officer so fast that.... "
.... You will see Jesus before breakfast.
I do love the name Donovan.
I bet Donovan stole a chocolate bar!!
I felt let down at the lack of creativity with "your head will spin" too.
but I can't think of anything better.
Donovan sounds hardcore.
As soon as I saw that it happened at the Circle K, I, too, thought of Bill and Ted. A few years back, a friend forwarded a list of terrific, memorable movie quotes. You were supposed to add one and forward it. My addition -- "There are strange things afoot at the Circle K." Possibly the best line in a movie ever.
Don't be so sure it's an empty threat. When my stalker/ex kept following me, calling me and harrassing my friends and family, I DID call his parole officer and that got rid of him right quick! (So wish I was kidding or making this up.)
"...so fast that time will stop and the earth will fall into the sun."
Now off to save Nell from Snidely... again!
That paper it's written on looks like accounting spreadsheets used in my accounting class. I hope Donovan didn't test her!
No one wants to be in prison with a name like Donovan. That's just asking to get beat with pillow cases full of soda cans.
what the hell happened at circle K?!