May 12, 2008

Donovan
FOUND by Chris in Near my office, Texas
Donovan must have done something...
Clover in the dark
I really wish I knew what Donovan did at the Circle K.
+ May 12, 2008 12:16 AM +
Night in gale
The word "twit" is a poor choice, in my opinion.

Also, the writer has severe upper case cursive D issues.
+ May 12, 2008 12:40 AM +
San in still stuck in the Midwest
Looks like the note is on accounting paper. Maybe someone 'cooked the books' at the Circle K. The writer must be looking for more of whatever Donavan did; the 'test me' is underlined so much it reads like a dare. Test me Donovan! Test me!
+ May 12, 2008 12:41 AM +
Farmer in In The Dell
All the ex-cons hanging out in all the Circle-Ks everywhere are ineveitably headed back to stir anyway, whether they pull that shit again or not. They can't help it. It's genetic.

Donovan's no exception. Trying to warn him is pointless. He'll never listen.
+ May 12, 2008 04:38 AM +
lars in all my forms in the nwc?
is it me or is this just one huge cliche?
+ May 12, 2008 05:42 AM +
mona lisa in the louvre
ok...write on the freaking lines. i haven't even read it yet.... i hate it when people write across the lines.

Lars. it is, just one cliche after another...

and what's a circle K?


Nightingale, i think "you stupid f**k" would have been better.
+ May 12, 2008 06:19 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork
"Circle K" used to be the college-level affiliate of the Kiwanis Club service organization. What are they doing letting in parole violators?

And why doesn't Donovan deserve a whole piece of paper for this note? Or was what he did [again!] so very bad?
+ May 12, 2008 06:42 AM +
chillin
Why wait? Call the probation officer now! Donovan obviously has not learned his lesson.

Circle K is a convenience store/gas station.
+ May 12, 2008 06:45 AM +
Tang in right down the street from Circle K.
Circle K is a convenience store, like 7-11.
Donovan will do it again, just call.
+ May 12, 2008 06:45 AM +
Jonathan too in my office (sshhh!) while it's sunny outside
I'm kind of imagining Michael Palin as the Monty Python lumberjack, trying very hard to be American and angry, but words fail him (because he's too nice) and the worst thing he can call his victim is 'you little twit'...

Oh phooey! Bother! Blow!

Or maybe it's Basil Fawlty trying to tell off Manuel for getting the dinner orders wrong again.

('But Mizza Fawltee! I know notheeng!')
+ May 12, 2008 06:45 AM +
dave in a cubicle
Obviously, Donovan was being irresponsible with his phone booth/time machine on loan from George Carlin again.
+ May 12, 2008 07:05 AM +
sitting in the classroom
Let's not cross the writer of this letter...they seem to be pretty ruthless.
+ May 12, 2008 07:37 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork
Service club ... Service station ... Gas station ... Convenience store ... I'm guessing Donovan followed the same downward path.

Donovan? From singing "They Call Me Mellow Yellow" to selling Mellow Yellow in the local convenience store. How far the great have come.

I'd better stop free-associating (was Donovan free-basing?) and get back to work.
+ May 12, 2008 07:43 AM +
Freonz freak in g hallucinations
The snippet under the title is beautiful in its simplicity: Donovan must have done something.
+ May 12, 2008 07:47 AM +
Ted, Theodore, Esquire in an '80's movie
Strange things afoot at the Circle K!
+ May 12, 2008 07:50 AM +
alan goes "pting" in Joe Strummer's head
The Circle K is obviously a dude ranch somewhere in Texas, and Donovan is a cowboy/outlaw always living on the edge of lawlessness.

Equally likely is the possibilty of a previously unreported scandal involving the quarterback for the Philadelphia Eagles and/or the guy who sang "Mellow Yellow."
+ May 12, 2008 08:45 AM +
LalasMama in Chicago
HAIL ATLANTIS!
+ May 12, 2008 08:55 AM +
Agent Ling Hi in the Orient Express
Who is testing whom? That is the question.
+ May 12, 2008 10:54 AM +
Sue Bee in the hive
Great find!
+ May 12, 2008 11:57 AM +
Marie in C-ville, VA
Awww, I forgot Circle K was a convenience store. I preferred to picture a seedy western bar.

I would bet money that he shoplifted.
+ May 12, 2008 12:43 PM +
Pepper in your anus
Nah Marie, he just acted up in the parking lot.
+ May 12, 2008 12:50 PM +
Out of patience
Pepper, stop it. Act like an adult, please.
+ May 12, 2008 02:17 PM +
Pepper in your anus
I'm sorry.
+ May 12, 2008 02:39 PM +
Kait in Arkansas
This was so a note passed in math class.
Look its on graph paper and they work twit and not a bad word so if the teacher did find it they wouldn't be in extra trouble.
+ May 12, 2008 03:45 PM +
Les Brers in A Minor
If that be the case, then why say shit?
+ May 12, 2008 04:08 PM +
Josie in Vancouver
I was really confused about this until I read the comments... I know circle K as the university level of Kiwanis, so convenience store makes a lot more sense. I wonder what was done to end up in prison to begin with?

Hahaha the answer for the spam protection is "420"
+ May 12, 2008 05:05 PM +
Agent Ling Hi in the Orient Express
Kait, that's not graph paper, that's ledger paper, what people used to use to keep track of accounts payable and receivable, lists of expenses and and income, basically. Bookkeepers used this before they had computer programs. (Do they still use ledger books like this? I don't know.)

And I'm not positive, but if a student has a parole officer, I don't think the teacher's gonna give a rat's ass about a kid's naughty language. (This did not come from a school!)
+ May 12, 2008 05:37 PM +
Christina in Illinois
I detest their handwriting. It is very awkward and hard to read.

For some reason this entire find just annoyed me. The handwriting, writing against the printed lines, trying to sound like a strict parent, empty threats, etc. I resorted back to being a teenager, inwardly rolling my eyes at an angry parent.

Donovan knows they will never call the parole officer, that's why he can get away with this. If they were the type of person to call, they would have done it the night before, not write it as a threat in a letter the next day.
+ May 12, 2008 05:47 PM +
Smallbear in the Cave
Probably not a lot of Donovans in prison, I would guess.
+ May 12, 2008 05:59 PM +
Bill S Preston in the same '80s movie.
HaHa @ Ted. As soon as I read the Circle K, I also thought something strange was afoot. Perhaps Donovan got mixed up in a wacky Bill & Ted debacle involving a slurpee machine and Ghengis Kan.... ?
+ May 12, 2008 06:21 PM +
Just me in my house
Why wait for the Donovan's next crime to call the parole officer? Donovan's actions at the circle K were obviously bad enough to warrant considering making the phone call right then. No one had the nuggets to deal with the situation. Now Donovan knows he can try whatever it was he did again. Probably get away with it (again) too. This is why we have criminals on the street and at places like Circle K.
+ May 12, 2008 08:30 PM +
LMA in Suburban Maryland
"I will call your parole officer so fast that ... that ... that ..." come on now, Donovan-hater, you have soooo left me hanging here! "That your head will spin, you little twit" is like something a sputtering villain in a '60s-era cartoon would bark out at Dudley Dooright -- it's hardly the dozens-level insult I'd expect from a parole-officer-calling Circle K customer. Let's help him out here, Founders; finish this sentence properly:

"If you ever pull that shit again with me like you did last night at the Circle K I will call your parole officer so fast that ..."
+ May 12, 2008 09:23 PM +
kitrona in IN
"If you ever pull that shit again with me like you did last night at the Circle K I will call your parole officer so fast that ..."

... your ass will light on fire.
+ May 12, 2008 09:41 PM +
Sara in Arizona
" if you ever pull that shit again with me like you did last night at the Circle K, I will call your parole officer so fast that.... "

.... You will see Jesus before breakfast.
+ May 12, 2008 10:52 PM +
Lauren in Muncie
I do love the name Donovan.
+ May 12, 2008 11:00 PM +
Holly the Homemaker in Toronto

I bet Donovan stole a chocolate bar!!
+ May 13, 2008 09:56 AM +
Laura, the girl in glasses
I felt let down at the lack of creativity with "your head will spin" too.

but I can't think of anything better.
+ May 13, 2008 12:16 PM +
hannah in your pants.
Donovan sounds hardcore.
+ May 13, 2008 07:57 PM +
miss gredenko in mn
As soon as I saw that it happened at the Circle K, I, too, thought of Bill and Ted. A few years back, a friend forwarded a list of terrific, memorable movie quotes. You were supposed to add one and forward it. My addition -- "There are strange things afoot at the Circle K." Possibly the best line in a movie ever.
+ May 14, 2008 08:57 AM +
Otherwise Smart Woman Who Once Dated a Convict in Chicago
Don't be so sure it's an empty threat. When my stalker/ex kept following me, calling me and harrassing my friends and family, I DID call his parole officer and that got rid of him right quick! (So wish I was kidding or making this up.)
+ May 14, 2008 11:24 AM +
Dudley in NWT
"...so fast that time will stop and the earth will fall into the sun."

Now off to save Nell from Snidely... again!
+ May 14, 2008 01:54 PM +
Denise in San Antonio
That paper it's written on looks like accounting spreadsheets used in my accounting class. I hope Donovan didn't test her!
+ May 21, 2008 03:06 PM +
Jason in Kentucky
No one wants to be in prison with a name like Donovan. That's just asking to get beat with pillow cases full of soda cans.
+ June 11, 2008 01:07 AM +
K-LA in Las Cruces, NM
what the hell happened at circle K?!
+ April 13, 2009 05:26 PM +

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