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March 28, 2008 |
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A Perfumed Remark
FOUND by Marie
in Charlottesville, Virginia
A few days ago, I was inspecting an elegant antique sterling perfume atomizer (I'm a dealer). I unscrewed the top and peeked into the narrow glass vial inside. There was no liquid, but there was a pleasant perfume aroma, plus this note, which was curled up inside. I had to use a pair of needle-nose pliers to remove it, as the vial was so narrow. And here it is!
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Pain! June 26, 2006 |
Untitled #2 June 22, 2003 |
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Untitled #6 January 19, 2006 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
This has got to be the Find to beat all Finds. So simple, but illegible enough to make you think you're misreading it. So nonsensibly mysterious. And where it was found! It's an antique Find! This is going into my favorites immediately. Thank you, Marie!
seems like someone's recounting their alien abduction experience. a Very Rare Find, indeed.
Is it written on a Post-it, though? the size/shape make it seem so, but that could just be how it's cropped.
what sound does a bad doctor make?
"oops. i didn't think that would happen."
thanks, Marie. Awesome find. This is too cool.
I'm not sure what sound a bad doctor makes but I can tell you first hand when you hear a hairdresser say 'uh oh' you're in trouble. Trust me on this.
Perfume? Ha! The perfume smell was just a convincing cover for what the vial really contained: CHLOROFORM!!!
The sound that the writer was referring to is the sound his victims made when they awoke to the sight of him prepping his slaughter area, basically the same sound you might make if you awoke to a man wearing a white coat and a stethoscope standing over you, holding a steak knife in each hand. A sound that literally screams "BAD DOCTOR!!!"
This topic got me thinking...everyone should read "Shroud of the Thwacker" by Chris Elliot (of "Get A Life" fame). It's a little bit dull at first, but then it takes off and is really hilarious. And totally unique.
Interesting how the second find of the day doesn't quite seem to be getting the same attention as the first one yet. It's like a private club or something. For once I'm in.
All doctors in opera are bad doctors. The sound they make is usually 'Don't worry, you'll be better soon' -- which is the kiss of death (La Traviata, Pelleas and Melisande...).
In La Boheme he's 'on his way' but doesn't even get there before Mimi snuffs it.
Mona, this is actually a round of Whose Line Is It Anyway? -- What line would you least wish to hear from a doctor? ('Where does this bit go?' was one of the better ones.)
For some reason this makes me think of a horror film: Family moves into an old house, finds some of the previous owner's belongings, locates some tell-tale signs (children's drawings etc.) indicating that something wasn't right... Strange things start happening (objects disappear,) this note is found by either the Mother or one of the kids... They begin to hear sounds in the night: “Herumph”ings, clinks of dropped instruments, faint voices calling out in panic: “Damn! I think I lost my watch in there!”…
Etc. etc.
You guys are so smart. I thought this was so cryptic, but you've explained the sound to me sufficiently. But who is "they" making that sound?
i'm telling ya: "They" is Aliens. You have the good doctors, and thn you have the BAD doctors. I seen 'em right there outside 'a my farm house. ("space critters, they stole my sweet thing")
@Lars in nwc, (who's probably way more responsible than me) Round 2.
they make a smell like someone who needs a doctor bad
I read: "They make a sauna like a bad doctor". The sound thing definitely makes more sense...
Ok, I'll say it, this find is crreeepy!
For some reason, the background (colour, crinkles, etc) looks like human skin. Add to this to it's mysterious findspot, the nonsensical, vaguely threatening meaning, and all your comments, and it gives me the heeby-jeebies! *shudder*
I kept reading "saund" like mispelled "sand"
and didn't get it
I guess "sound" makes more sense :[
Indy said exactly what I was thinking! This looks like that creepy killer from Silence of the Lambs that took off people's skin & made a dress out of it.
Just like a good ninja, a good doctor doesn't make a sound....
I think jonathan is on the right track with this one...
the writer is at an improve show and they ask the audience for suggestions because each character needs a strange personality trait. So the person writes this suggestion and either it gets picked and they feel really special, or they wrote it but decided it was too dumb and so they never handed it in. Either way i think the person saved it to remember the good time they had at the improve show.
but maybe i'm wrong...maybe it really is creepy like you say
This makes me think of Zombie Holocaust, also know as Dr Butcher MD (medical deviant) One classic line being "The patient's screaming disturbing me, performed removal of vocal chords"
Now this find is creepy. It looks like human skin to me, too. I wonder who was the poor tortured soul that stashed this note away and why? Was he/she the tortured or the torturer? And whose skin is this anyway?
I find it interesting what senses are involved in this. You would feel the creepy paper, smell the delightful scent then read about a sound a doctor makes. What does it taste like? Crayons?
@Flargy: ha! Had a good (sinister) laugh at that one!
@Jonathan: smart and insightful as always.
@I'm in way over...: that's a brilliant backstory. I like it!
This is a great find -- enough substance to get our minds going without so much that everything gets explained away (how could ever truly explain this odd find? I'm sure even the "real" story is unbelievable).
As to this two-a-day thing, some of you must be seeing the "next" arrows right after midnight, whereas I never saw them on the balloon find until noon. And after noon foundmagazine brings me to the second find. Still a little glitchy, I guess. For Jason: I'm using Firefox 2.0.0.12 (the newest update installed a day or two ago), if that is of any interest to you.
@not-so-clever: It's true! There's a break in the am/pm continuum, for now. This will exist for the next few days so enjoy it while it's here. Next week the holes will be patched, but for now, feel free to sneak ahead and do some timetravelling.
Anything at all like the sound of one hand clapping?
I love the find story. Thanks for sharing! :)
OOO! It's me! How exciting!!!
I love things that I can't figure out.
Your comments are so clever!
@ Not a post-it - cropping.
This is one of my 2 all-time favorite finds that I personally have found (the other is in one of the Found books - a grocery list listing satan, small animals and "drug" twice.) Or maybe this is the 1st, what with the lovely vial and the very deliberate but perplexing placement of the note.
The 3rd favorite might be a few sinister words I found written in marker on a broken piece of thin plexiglass in a parking lot. Something about "dead doctors", something like "I like dead doctors" written in marker on a broken piece of thin plexiglass I found in a parking lot. Why doctors?
It makes sense that they are all 3 creepy - I think I give that vibe out! In fact today I was helping little kids make shadow boxes a la Joseph Cornell, and one of them made an elaborate, cheerful "Torture Chamber", with many specific fates to afall the unfortunate. His regular teacher said that he had never made anything dark like that. Ha.
they make a pizza pie like a bad italian.
@ night: probably not as responsible as you think i am.
A sound of arrogance?
A sound of incompetence?
A sound of sadism?
A sound of anger?
A sound of silence?
Good find.
Not only is this a great find, but this is the most awesomely located found ever!
I remembered exactly what is on that piece of plexiglass I mention above:
"dead doctors don't lie"
!!!!
I always pictured it left on the windshield of a doctor as a threat that he had better say the right thing in trial or ELSE.
Effie, I thought the same thing - but I was thinking of "Re-Animator" one of those bad movies that's so bad, it's good:
As the beheaded scientist is holding his beheaded head to give a lady some head (literally):
"And you call yourself a doctor!"
Later -
"Who's going to believe a talking head? Get a job in a sideshow!"
Makes me wanna write those lines down, curl up the paper and put it in a perfume atomizer. Oh. No, wait. That's been done.
@Marie: this Find is great all the way around! If you could make a wild guess, what date would you put on this note?
@Lars: that pie must be Sicillian?
A wild guess - 1930s-40s, though the vial itself was more 1900s. It was written with a colored or grease pencil-like instrument.
Lars,
Aren't we all less responsible at night?