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September 19, 2007 |
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Crazie Phychos
FOUND by Anne Kuhns
in Atlanta, Georgia
My roommate and I were walking to the corner store on a rainy Saturday morning, and we found this lying on the sidewalk. I can only assume that the writer and the recipient are BOTH psychos.
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Full o'Shit Tubby December 28, 2006 |
Blue Things ... May 02, 2008 |
Hindsight Is 20/20 October 19, 2003 |
The Best Thing Ever June 26, 2005 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
who hasnt known a couple of these types
you promise? Cause I've got mace. and a whistle. and a billy club. and a coyote who's not fearful for humans anymore...
Try me!** (:-))
Nicely put.
I think this is a note from a roomate to another, not so thoughtful, roomate. I think I (a normal, relatively, well adjusted) college grad, have written a few notes like this for not washing your own dishes or eating all your roomates cereal.
I have felt that many times before.
What, they're threatening to turn into algae?
Look it up.
Assuming that is a typo, the question remains:
Can psycho-ness really be planned? Usually that sort of thing cannot be controlled - it just...IS....
They were already following through with their typo-ness.
Turns out it's still a typo if they were referring to algae... (phyco)...
I like the algae comment. It gives this whole scenario a sci-fi feel. Like the note could be the setup for a bad movie.
Phyco-ness! What a great bad movie! Sounds like Soylent Green meets The Stuff! I love it, L!
This would not be nearly so awesome if not for the hyphen, that just makes this. I also prefer to pretend that it is not a typo and that they really mean that they are going to "get algae" on someone's ass. Whatever that means!
;-)
man... i think my bathroom is going phyco on me. What did i ever do to my toilet?
This is so something I would write. To anyone and everyone.
Fiiiive tiiiimes twoooo issss tennnnn!
Also, I would like to note that whoever wrote this is my enemy now. No one threatens meh. Evuh.
I KNEW it! It's not always the stalker. Sometimes it's the stalkee.
Chips Ahoy to Dry Bone Bronson!
The first thing that came to me when I read this:
I can’t seem to face up to the facts
I’m tense and nervous and I can’t relax
I can’t sleep because my bed’s on fire
Don’t touch me I’m a real live wire.
"Phycho" Killer
Qu'est-ce que c'est?
fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa far better
Run run run run run run run away
I understand that phycho is another term for algea, but what is an "Arnpit" especially if it is possible it might be in my face??
I'd like to have this printed on a t-shirt for myself.It's exactly how I'm feeling today !
I know I would go phychotic if I had an arnpit in my face. Maybe he is able to not follow through on his plan of phycho-ness if he isn't provoked by some a-hole that needs to lay off his Kool-Aid. When a phycho tells you to back off, you do -- no questions asked.
Now THIS is a find! I love it when I go phycho-ness.
Plan of Phyco-ness: I think that was the working title of The Day of the Trifids. I'm going to keep a bottle of saline on hand just in case.
I love it when Mona Lisa goes phycho.
ANNE ALWAYS GETS ALL THE CREDIT.
(I always imagined that the author of this note was English for some reason.)
Elliot Ness has been sent to Scotland to figure out who, or what, has been killing stupid tourists. He finds himself in Loch Ness in search of the infamous "Phycho-Ness", which, to this day, is still at large. (and I meant LARGE)
(and I mean at large) not "meant". sheesh.
Phycho-ness was my favorite typo of the day until Animal pointed out Arnpit - which made me laugh. Wouldn't arnpit be the Talk Like A Pirate pronunciation of armpit? (Remember to stretch out the "arrrr" portion.)
Is this a sign? I ended things with my guy last night. Wish I had used this note. Perhaps I would not have received the 2am call.
And could we call phycho-ness the new green movement? Save the Earth - become phycho-ness!
This is TOO creepy, but funny though. "phycho-ness' isn't even a word. The correct term would have been psychosis. Who am I to judge though. I like it. I wonder what their 'plan' was or how far they took it.
I like this note. At least they were considerate enough to give one last warning before they flipped their shit!
Arrrgh, Found guys. How long will it be before we can look forward to being able to order T-shirts with our favourite find on them?
I guess it wouldn't be too difficult to print these up on purchased t-shirt transfer paper, but it's so much nicer to send money to random people and get a t-shirt in the mail.
I love it when you make me all sneezy, Pepper... ooh, can you imagine, if I was all phycotic, and I sneezed? ewwww... gross.
The correct term, Sean S. would be psychotic. As in: "before i go all psychotic on you"
I really hope his plan involves walkin' the plank and rapin'. Those are the best.
I read this as a warning, You'll be sorry if you leave because you won't get to find out my awesome plan. It would make me stay for sure, just out of curiosity.
If I had a stalker I would stalk them back instead of leaving lame-ass vaguely threatening notes.
Muckrak - thanks for sticking up for me yesterday - I wasn't here to do it myself. I have three young sons and today is a BIG deal to us. We wear hats and eyepatches and fight with swords and eat fishsticks for dinner every year. (They used to think the Gordon's fisherman was a pirate.)
AARRRGHH, Hoist the mail sail we be headen' fer home boys!
Your work is great!
I am a recreational cyclist. You would not believe all the things, lost or discarded, that can be seen along the road from a bike saddle - constant entertainment.
This note was written by Butters.
Aye, Dry Bone. Walkin' the plank is the best.
this is a much nicer way of saying, "Back off, mofo, before I whoop your ass!" I'll have to try using this instead, perhaps it will get me less jail time.
And I agree, if this was on a t-shirt, I'd buy one.
Damnable match spam questions! Make me break out the pen and paper.
"Arrrgh, Found guys. How long will it be before we can look forward to being able to order T-shirts with our favourite find on them?"
Well Ms. Mona Clairvoyant, we might have an interesting announcement in a few weeks about that!
oooh..... and they say i'm not on the cutting edge of things. That makes me happy, James. You guys are the bestest ever.
arrrrgh.
Ahoy, Dry Bone, 'tis no bother at all. Us pirate types gotta stick together, or we hang together.
hah, you phycho guys crack me up!
anyway, this just reminded me of a story i heard where some woman was taking a walk or something one night, and became aware of a man following her. he caught her by the arm, and she started barking at him. he let go and ran away.
and that is my story of psychoness. pretend you are a psycho, and people will leave you alone.
I had the same thought, Dry Bone.
So THATS where I left that note. Do you think you can mail that back to me? I really need to give it to this mailbox that has secrets about me...
i think i'll print this one for my desk at work.
Phyconess is when they go Norman Bates on your credit score.
Don't mess with me man, I'm about to get PHYCO! You're score's goin' down, bro.
Gah! I do know the difference between your and you're.
SuzyQ, I love your story! I'll remember that if I ever get mugged. If "stay away from me and I'll not follow through with my plan of phycho-ness" doesn't work, I mean. Poor confused mugger...
Okay, mispelling aside (and it is hilarious, thanks) this find demonstrates the fucked up emotional life being led by far too many people in our society.
I blame capitalism (of course) by reducing human activity and labor power to a commodity and divorcingan individual from the product of his labor, capitalism alienates the individual from society and from himself. Thus, we can no longer have a genuine direct emotional response.
Then bourgeois art, with it's embrace of aristotillian drama creates exciting new emotional connections for these alienated consumers. Connections which, through identification with characters and stories rather than with each other teach us new approaches to emotional response. This approach can more easily be attached to products and commodities, as in advertising, and also, can be exchanged as a commodity itself, as in the entertainment industry.
This new approach fills the lack of genuine emotional responses caused by alienation with scripted premeditated emotional responses, which further re-affirms the status quo in our society, first by wasting our time creating drama for ourselfs (plans of phyco-ness) and seond by making indentification and aristotilian drama stronger. When watching bourgeois theatre we say: "wow, i feel like that myself sometimes" of course you do, your respose has been appropriated and re-written by these same people in every film, play or TV show you've seen since childhood.
... or maybe i've just been reading WAY too much Brecht lately.
Rex, you HAVE been reading too much Brecht. You sound prepared for your Philosophy exam, though.
From the Onion (America's Finest News Source)
Guy In Philosophy Class Needs To Shut The Fuck Up
HANOVER, NH—According to students enrolled in professor Michael Rosenthal's Philosophy 101 course at Dartmouth College, that guy, Darrin Floen, the one who sits at the back of the class and acts like he's Aristotle, seriously needs to shut the fuck up.
His fellow students describe Floen's frequent comments as eager, interested, and incredibly annoying.
"He thinks he knows about philosophy," freshman Duane Herring said. "But I hate his voice, and I hate the way he only half raises his hand, like he's so laid back. We're discussing ethics in a couple weeks, but I don't know if I can wait that long before deciding if it's morally wrong to pound his face in."
"Today he was going on and on about how Plato's cave shadows themselves represent the ideal foundation of Western philosophical thought," said freshman Julia Wald moments after class let out Monday. "I have no idea what Plato's ideal reality is, but I bet it doesn't include know-it-all little shits."
Wald added: "If he uses the word 'dialectical' one more time, I'm going to shove my copy of The Republic down his throat."
Although he demonstrated a familiarity with Peter Singer's view on famine relief during a discussion of John Locke's theory of property, Floen is reportedly unfamiliar with the theory of cramming it for a change and giving someone else a chance to speak.
"Just last week Professor Rosenthal was talking about Russell's Paradox, and that jackass starts going off: 'But what about Heraclitus' aphorism: Everything flows, nothing stands still?'" classmate James Luers said. "At first I was like, 'That's totally irrelevant,' but then I was like, 'Well, actually, it does apply to the nonstop flapping of your trap.'"
Among the 40 students who regularly attend Philosophy 101, the one who has endured the most suffering is freshman William Deekes.
"Some people know Darrin as just 'that guy in philosophy class who needs to shut the hell up,'" Deekes said. "I, however, also know him as 'the douche in African history who seriously needs to chill' and 'the a-hole in environmental sciences who could really use a girlfriend.'"
"I enrolled in this course because I was fascinated by the question of God," said sophomore Miriam Blank. "After spending six hours a week in the same room as that unbearable windbag, I think I have my answer. Life is as long as it is cruel."
The outspoken student has not gone unremarked by the course's professor.
"Mr. Floen is a valuable contributor to our in-class discussions," Rosenthal said. "His tendency to question and challenge everything before him captures the very essence of philosophy itself."
Rosenthal added: "Having said that, I do wish he would occasionally do me the valued service of shutting his damn cake hole."
Amusing spelling mistake asside, am I the only one who finds this a tad creepy? This person has a plan of psychoness all prepared in case the other one doesn't stay away. Who is crazier, the stalker, or the psych planner??
On another note, I too have a plan of psychoness if people I don't like don't stay away from me :-)
and we see how the entertainment industry will even overtly provide the fodder for anti-intellectualism and deny the possibility of a positive emotional response to education (education being a step toward developing something like revolutionary class consciousness).
The capitalist education is a labor process, by which you develop yourself as a product, so you cannot let yourself admit that you have something to learn because that indicates a shortcoming of your product (yourself) in the eyes of potential buyers.
Nice reference, Cotton - I can hear Psycho Killer in the background as this disgruntled college student scratches angrily at a sheet of paper at 3:39 in the morning.
I wonder what psycho-ness he or she would have done? Perhaps they are a Psycho-for-hire and I can contract them to hatch up psycho-ness plans for those on my shit list! Now that would be thrilling!
Dry Bone Bronson and Muckrake,
You are both dumb. And my co-workers all love me.
Have fun quoting "Anchor Man" for the rest of your life.
I'm sure you think that your co-workers love you. As do mine. Have a lovely day, Nonnie. Why would i quote "Anchor Man"?
nonnie - The only movie worth quoting is The Princess Bride. The shrieking eels!!!!
Btw, who gives a fuck if their coworkers like them?!?
When did that become the litmus test for a happy life?
Thanks Turbo. Everyone needs more Onion in their life! That was hilarious. (No disrespect, Rex. But you have to agree that was funny!)
By the way, Rex, isn't it the responsibility of the individual to culture him/herself as a person? And we have to do this despite the culture and environment we are in. We have the capability, being "reasoning" creatures and with all the resources available to us. Some do and some don't. I guess that's free will for ya, eh?
Dry Bone -
What about Monty Python and the Holy Grail?
Dry Bone, you are SO correct it's..... INCONCEIVABLE!!!
OK OK not the ONLY one then - but c'mon - THE CLIFFS OF INSANITY - makes me laugh every time I hear it. But "Help help I'm being oppressed" is right up there.
Alai - you keep using that word - I do not think it means what you think it means.
I have to agree about Monty Python... any of the movies, really, although the Holy Grail is, well, The Holy Grail. He's only a wee bunny...
i wonder what the plan of 'phycho-ness' was and if it actually executed.
I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake. Until then, rest well and dream of large women.
...you'd quote anchor man because you quote old movie lines that have been overused as it is. thank you for proving my point that your sense of humor extends only as far as to repeat lines you heard in a movie in 1986. congratulations on you most definitely not being the most annoying person people know. seriously.
oh and hope you enjoyed talking like a pirate day or whatever it is you're doing. i'm sure everyone around you got quite a chuckle!
Nonnie, enough already. Not funny - never was and it's getting on my nerves. You are officially the most annoying person I have ever had contact with. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! I fart in your general direction!
you breathing gets on my nerves alai. or trying to insult me without even having enough sense to make up your own insults.
your life must be so empty. i am so glad i'm not you. i have a feeling you're in therapy and enjoy macrame.
Oh Nonnie. So I'm not the most annoying person people know? I'm a little confused. If that was, indeed, a compliment, thank you, Nonnie. You're probably not the most annoying person people know, either. And if Dry Bone keeps his pirateness in his house, goofing around with his kids, he's probably not that annoying in public, or in the workplace, either. But his kids probably think he rocks.
My sense of humour goes way beyond quoting lines from movies, Nonnie. Frankly, I don't remember them well enough. (i plead an exception, with regard to the wee bunny line i quoted earlier) I do find pirates funny, tho.
Do you have a sense of humour? I truly would like to know. What do you think is funny? It would be most helpful if you could provide an example.
I love it when you try to be patronizing. Cute. Also, I don't have a sense of humor. All I basically do is sit around and cry and then wipe the tears onto my naked body.
oh and if that is the case with drybone i really think he should get a job. why is he sitting around being lazy with his kids? get out there and contribute to society already.
No, Nonnie, that would be YOU. I've never heard someone so completely against good, clean fun. Makes me wonder wtf you're even doing here in the first place. Unclench. Breathe. Enjoy life.
Arrrrrrrggghhhh!
good clean fun is for losers.
He does have a job, Nonnie, he said that yesterday. I was implying that he did not act like a pirate, when he was gainfully contributing to society, but reserved that behaviour for when he was home with his kids. You don't read very well, do you.
buck up, man, and put some freaking clothes on. and yes, as amazed says, just breathe, relax... Stop being so judgenmental. You are too full of stress.
I was not being patronizing about the sense of humour thing. What does make you laugh? If its not pirates and well made comedy films, then what is it?
(I'm sure you know, but my other comment was in reference to nonnie's "the most annoying person people know" comment..)
who knew so many posts could happen in the span of such a short time?
nonnie, are you just stalking the board so you can attack the second someone posts about you? That's pitiful.
no i don't read very well. that's what happens when you grow up in foster care, you don't stay at a school long enough to finish a lesson plan.
i find nothing funny. nothing. i never laugh. ever. EVER. except at farts.
pretty much, and i know.
Imposter, don't get in this, Nonnie is having enough trouble as it is. I don't think he'll find that funny. And i bet he doesn't think farts are funny, either.
no it's me. seriously. honestly i just think it's funny that people get so mad about some idiot (me obviously and it is me, not an imposter) posting idiotic comments and just being a jerk. honestly i'm just trying to irritate you now, and you're letting it. relax, talk like a pirate day is fine especially for kids and i love princess bride. why would you even care what i say?
Nonnie, you have excellently made my point for me. Thanks! Although, I have to amend my statement a bit - you are the most annoying person I have come into contact with TODAY.
I wonder, though, with such a wonderful life and friends, why you would need to be so negative and mean spirited? Hmm... something to think about Nonnie. Have a great day!
I wish that my post happened on time. Stupid slow network!
And it is all in good fun, no nonnie?
So Nonnie, if good clean fun is for losers...
...is good dirty fun for winners?
I want to be a winner then! Nothin' better than a little dirty fun!
Everyone needs a little more fun in their lives...
...and if Dry Bones brings that to his children’s lives, it’s indeed a stellar contribution to society!
Maybe if you had a parent like that you’d get off your ass and quit wiping the tears on your naked body!
By the way, what do you do about the snot?
I like to laugh at crying pirates....
Avast, me hearties! This be the cap'n, remember to get oranges on the way home so ye don't get the scurvy.
I'm going to type my comment in all caps so that you will feel my enthusiasm:
I LOVE THIS FIND!!
Psst! Dry Bone Bronson.... how do you speak pirate? I don't know how. I know, I know, I had a very sheltered childhood. All I know is Arrg, Maties, and grog. Pitiful, huh? Can I have a crash course?
I think "Talk Like a Pirate Day" has been fun, and not at all annoying in my workplace. Granted, I am self employed with a rather small staff, but if you HAVE to work, what's wrong with making it fun?
Alai, what about "scurvy", as in "Avast, ye scurvy dog" ?
we love you too, nonnie.
arrrgh
Arr! Thanks Tess, ye scurvy dog! (How did that sound? Almost real,eh?)
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.v
Pepper/Herve: Would you please stop baiting people? Your "nonnie" shtick is as disruptive as your impersonations.
Everyone else: Stop taking the bait! If someone criticizes you or your post, either ignore it or say something constructive in return. If you join in the name-calling and personal attacks, you're just giving the agitator what he wants.
and the terrorists win.
Alai - i'll let you in on a little secret - I really don't know how either - I just imagine what my father-in-law (from the UP of Michigan) would say and make the ayy into arr.
They say things like - Down the bank aways - meaning something is located farther south but still on the lakeshore.
So if you ask me where I'm from on Pirate Day it turns into:
Where do you live?
AARRGH, I be from down the bank aways ye scallywag.
So it's informative and yet vague enough to make you realize that pirates don't like to answer questions.
Get it?
Mona Lisa, I wouldn't pick on you if I didn't like you so much.
Hey James, if you are doing T shirts, make sure you do the "I'm going to pee in your laundry basket" P.S. Forgive my typos, I'm mixing commenting with Merlot.
Well we had a really cool find to deal with today,and good tshirt news,and yet somehow it's digressed into a damn pirate conversation.We get a kitty find and comment all day about kitties, but here's a ripe topic of psycho-ness and what happens? A bunch of people writing arggg. Nonnie jerk,you're not interesting.
how to talk like a pirate:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=fqMu6e5Dgtg
LOL! I love this. This sums it all up for me.
I'm making this into a t-shirt or greeting card for my therapist.
This is the best find in a long, long time.
Thanks everyone for a great Pirate-y day!
Thanks Found Dudes for the find AND the T-Shirts!!! You guys rock!
Sail on me Maties! Arrg!
This is a pretty pedestrian FIND. Please, y'all, FIND something better to do with your time. Or wait until tomorrow when the mona & SALT show is back in town and we can all ignore the find and post stupid comments about ourselves. Can't wait!
jennie.I seriously don't get by " a pedestrian " find.At risk of getting flailed by everybody who gets it, wtf does that mean? The rest of it I completely agree with.
get what you mean by, I meant.
I've been thinking about this find all day, and I was thinking maybe he was writing this note to.....himself?
I want a tee shirt with Ancient Vivid Nightmare on it! Or Ancient Vivi Nashmare. Whatever.
Oh Pepper, i knew it was cuz you loved me.
my songs are so much more so real than Dave Rummans' songs are. his songs are downright fake compared with mine. So real.
Jay, you have a way with words. 'Flipped his shit!" hilarious! This find would stand up in a court of law as an official warning to beware! Especially one of those courtroom shows on tv!
Hey Fellow FOUNDers!
Guess it's just me.... not a Grammar Gripe --BUT.... how can it be a "typo" when it sure looks to me like a "write-o".
Just questioning... :-)
--milkin it for all it's worth-- (?)
Plan of psycho-ness is your behavior continues:
1. Pour honey on armpits and not allow you to shower.
2. dump fish guts in your trunk in a heat spell.
3. follow you around and repeat everything you say.
4. Collect my toe nails in a plastic bag and place it under your pillow.
And this plan of psych-ness is just begining!!!!
Am I the only one who saw this and thought Earthbound? Helps that I'm playing mother 3 right now, though.