 |
May 20, 2008 |
|
 |
|
|
Idiot List
FOUND by Rudy Luciani
in Chicago, Illinois
Found along the walk.
Sign in or register to start a profile and keep track of your comments. You may also post without creating a profile, but you'll have to answer some tough spam protection questions.
The Two Treasures May 04, 2003 |
Thursday April 27, 2003 |
I Don't Know How... October 12, 2003 |
I Will Take It In... February 18, 2006 |
 |
|
 |
         |
We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
» We're hopping on a plane and jetting to Europe for our Fall 2008 Euro Tour!
» Join Peter Rothbart for his mini-tour of the Pacific Northwest
I vote candidate three.
Me too- P sounds good until you see "idiot," which would be a deal-breaker for me. I'd take R.
On the bottom of Number 3 I thought it said "Louse. Stable Income."
I vote for Number 2. I don't care if he is an idiot. The rest makes up for it. Number 1 is self-absorbed and Number 3 has child support (and presumably an ex-wife he has to deal with because of the kids.)
on the plus side for bachelor number two: well hung.. on the plus side for number three: good sex. I wonder how much size factors into her final decision.
Number one's just funny and cute, with suitable housing.
ooops. I just realized as I was hitting post that I mixed up the numbers... oh well. And it says good sex PARTNER.. not just good sex.
I need a cold shower.
How about none of them? She's so desperate to have a man that she resorts to eeny-meeny-miny-moe type games, and the two of the contenders are described as self-absorbed idiots.
Interesting. My initial impression is that the author is as shallow as the legal pad paper is thin. Like Just Me said: she likely doesn't deserve any of them.
Not that good sex with idiots is bad thing (sometimes)...
Hmm... I've made these lists to help a date-or-dump decision. Turns out, the need to make the list means that either a miracle or a breakup is required.
does no one else find this as disgusting as i do? if you have to list the pros and cons of three seperate people, you're not ready for a relationship above high school level.
I love this...and I love the fact that they are spoilt for choice most people only get one idiot at a time....wow
PS I vote for 3, even though he is not a great sex partner or funny at least he's not an idiot but the Child support/ ex wife is not very appealing, still no ones perfect. Plus no one is funny after 7 years, 3 kids a dog and a mortgage....oh maybe thats just me
Ahahaha!! I think this is hilarious! If having to write down the 'positives & negatives' of the 3 men you're interested in helps make your decision, so be it! No one is perfect!
I'd take bachelor #2!!!!
hummm... have to choose R- even with the kids/child support if he *really* pays the child support that says something positive about responsibility.... idiots are annoying, not worth the good sex. (because then they either a) talk about their ex's b)get up to play 'super smash brothers' or c) call their mother.)
Looks like someone was taking notes between commercials during their appearance on “The Dating Game”.
Well, at least all three are "interested in you" . . . which tells me that this list wasn't even writen out by the woman who can't make up her mind, it was written down by her friend. In other words, for a woman who both can't make up her mind AND can't think for herself.
Run guys! Run! Get away while you can!!
This is sooo romantic! I guess I'm just bitter bc I've never had three guys to choose from.
With number one it's no sex, no time, no fun so he's out. Number two is an idiot so he's out. I vote for # 3.
Librarian, maybe she's addressing herself in the second person. Like Crazy Jimmy.
I kind of agree with what people have said - she's clearly not THAT into any of them if she has to make a list. I mean, none of these looks like a true love situation exactly. I think everybody would be better off if she got a bit of distance from the relationships.
Not that I'm an expert at relationships (except failed ones), but sometimes people who look great on paper don't work out in real life, and the ones with a longer list of cons are the ones you really want to be with, despite their faults.
I wouldn't necessarily write her off as shallow and immature, though - like Holly said, nobody's perfect.
But if I had to choose I'd vote #3.
GOLDDIGGER
Why does everyone assume it's a woman's list? Couldn't a woman be paying child support?
Church Mouse: A woman could be paying child support, but it is hard for a woman to be "well hung."
On number three, 5 down it says "interested in me." I think that's a number one requirement. Who wants someone who not interested. Is number one married?
They all say "interested in you", Paul. And yeah, they seem to be NOW.
Keep looking honey. You gotta kiss a lotta frogs.
R! R! R!
Come on - A is boring and no fun and P is a loser!
Some people, like me, organize their thoughts much better - even (and especially!) in serious situations - by writing a list like this.
Now as for shallow, I'd say if she likes them all, she is not shallow, she is trying to make a smart choice. But if she is ONLY choosing based on the listed characteristics, she is shallow.
I'm with you on this one, Nightingale. Keep looking.
Having to make a list about three guys suggests that she's not 'in love' with any of them. I think she is either shallow and immature, as suggested, or desperate, and thinking that true love is never going to happen for her.
Does anyone else notice that personality is on the positive and negative sides for all three candidates? If the personality is iffy on all three men, I'd say keep it movin', honey.
Liz, why am I not surprised that you "wouldn't necessarily write her off as shallow and immature"? Oh, yeah, I remember.
If this was a GUY writing a list ... nice tits, good f*ck, makes a lot of money, whoops! has kids and needs to lose 20 pounds! Yikes!etc ... would you be as charitable?
Excuse me while I go puke.
I thought Number 3 sounded 'practically perfect in every way' until I saw he's still legally married. Move on, Girl.... and the first two have WAY too many negatives. I love this Find. Looking back, I wish someone would have helped me make lists like this!
It's not necessarily a woman...what if it's a gay man?
To all of you who'd choose #3: How can you ignore "Seperated, Pending D[ivorce]?" Yeah right -- keep holding your breath for that one!
I'm agreeing that none of them look like decent choices at all, and that the list-maker is not headed in the correct direction to find happiness.
Why are the names blurred out? I want to know who's a hoser. Oh wait. Is that "no sex" under A?
I like how A and R have "kids" as negatives. But she manipulated P's not having kids into a plus.
Speed dating notes perhaps? She doesn't know anything about them but this stuff and is trying to decide if she wants to persue a date with any of them. That's what i think.
She shouldn't even consider Alex. He's involved for chrissake. And Phil's an idiot who is only a good sex partner. Not great. I'd pick Rick if I had to choose between these three.
But really being single is so good!
Personality should come first. Because, really, when everything else is gone and you're all alone in your rocking chairs at the retirement home you will need good conversation. I know I'm all set!
How about e) none of the above?
If you have to list a person's pros and cons, it's not worth it. Trust me on this one. You do or you don't.
LOL @ Amanda - Speed dating where you get to f*** everybody? Sign me up! Oh, no, wait - that sounds gross.
These do seem like shallow, shallow considerations to me. I don't understand how A can be fun, yet boring. And a hoser. I think she really like A, and is trying to talk herself out of it.
I'm not going to correct "like A" to "likes A". I'm above all that. ;)
Mona and Night, I'm with you guys on this.
When raising my daugters my standard line of advice was that it can be more fun looking for a boyfriend than having one.
Of course, they didn't always follow this advice so there was a household rule that they weren't allowed to mourn a relationship longer than it lasted.
I find this more depressing than funny.
Wow. If she needs to make a pros and cons list, she should just move on and find someone else.
so, why does everyone think it's a woman's list?
oh, I didn't catch "well Hung"
Curious Kat, that sounds like my mom's advice when it comes to buying some gadget or new purse or something. Is it going to be more fun wanting it, or having it. I wish i had applied that to my relationships, instead of shoes.
What's the ugliest part of your body?
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
But I think it's your mind.
Stable income is pretty important. Otherwise, you may end up supporting him (been there, done that).
@Generally: dude, I'd just rather not judge people based on a scrap of paper they left lying around. Possibly written while drunk, or in a moment of weakness. Sorry about making you want to puke, based on assumptions you've made about how I would react in a hypothetical situation. Jeez Louise.
I AM A WOMAN THEREFORE I MUST HAVE DOUBLE STANDARDS, BASED ON NO EVIDENCE WHATSOEVER, AND THE FACT I DON'T AUTOMATICALLY JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS ABOUT THE WORTH OF ANOTHER HUMAN BEING MAKES ME A HORRIBLE HORRIBLE PERSON
OK THEN
The stable income item made think of this joke:
What do you call a musician with out a girl friend?
Homeless!
Reminds me of one of my darker moments. I made one of these in high school with a boy that I had a crush on debating the pro/cons of a girl that he had a crush on. She found it.
I'm sorry Elise.
If I had screened people out simply because they were an idiot - I would have never gone on a single date.
If you honestly find that your choices in a mate come down to these three options, you really should be reconsidering compulsory heterosexuality. Or taking a personal vow of celibacy. Seriously.
#1 is married too....She's got "involved" on the list...she sounds like an escort trying to pick a relationship from some of her dates...Who the hell else gets with so many married men???
All 3 sound like duds - where is option 4?
#1 just sounds uptight, boring, and preoccupied with other parts of his life. #2 apparently is an idiot, haha which for me would automatically dismiss him, but I guess not for our list-maker. #3 does have child support and I can't read the first part, but I'd go for him judging by this list.
I like this find, it's a pretty deep look into somebody's brain. A lot of our recent finds have just been scratches at the surface.
Mr. Boring, Mr. Idiot, or Mr. Louse...
OMG! I'm dating those guys too. Damn boring idiot louse two timers.
I wonder how offended a person might be to find themselves on a 'pros and cons' list with two other people. I think my dignity and self-respect would help narrow down the choices by forcing me to walk away.
Didn't Ross do one of these in Friends once? haha. Mega lame
I say enjoy fucking the idiot for a while, until you've grown up a bit
I don't think that's "Louse". It's in the positives, so I think she's saying he has a House. Or he is House, but that wouldn't be a positive for me (Hugh Laurie, on the other hand...)
I'd do House in a heartbeat if he weren't totally gay for Wilson.
*gasp* I love how this find somehow got turned into talking about House. My friend and I play this game where we take normal conversation and see if we can somehow turn it into a discussion about House. We're nerds and we love it : D
Whoa. Did SALT come out as a woman? And how come no one's bitching about the list maker not utilizing the lines on the paper? And Effie, Ross had a whole long list of Rachel's flaws, and the other chick's negative was that she wasn't "Rachem". These lists need to be made on self-destructive paper. But then we'd miss all this fun.
What an indecisive, low self - esteem home wrecker.
@yup; it didn't bother me that the person didn't use the lines...although now that you mentioned it I find it rather annoying. What did bug me was the fact that the paper is folded into 4 columns but there are only 3 categories. I know, I know, I'm sure the folding was just folding, and was not meant to be columns, but it bugs me nonetheless.
I like how she went out of her way to write "Interested in you" for each one.
I have to wonder what A's first + was, before it was scratched out.
Look at the D's at the end of absorbed and involved in A's negative column. I'll have to try to find that in my handwriting analysis book. It must mean "something."
This looks like it was written by two people. Person 1 started the list by querying Person 2 involved with these guys, trying to help out. Person 2 later added some final info to the list after P1 had left, possibly after doing a bit of research to find out about the stable income and the house situation.
I'm gonna say that it was written in two segments with different pens, but that both were written by the same hand- note the g in A-6 "boring", and compare to the g in P-2 "good sex" (!)- they're the same. Also the d at the end of R's "child support" looks like those other artifically inflated Ds from the other entries.
I can tell from the handwriting that she likes P the best. I wonder exactly what he did to earn the label "idiot"...
I think that the powerhouse of positives that she wrote down without hesitation for P (she had to think for awhile for the other two) tells the underlying truth that she knows herself.
Good question, jerry. I was thinking it just meant "he's not that bright", but actually "idiot" is pretty harsh for that. Sounds like he did something to piss her off.
I feel like a fool... How soon can you get here?
I don't understand the numbering system. What is the point of numbering anyway? They all sound pretty bad.
I'm also annoyed by the folding and that the writer didn't use the lines.
little bunny, it is funny the things that annoy us. i know a girl who is annoyed if a paper bends, as what happens when the corners of two papers are stapled together, and you want to turn the page. at school during tests, she takes the staples out, and after she's done, she restaples them. I wonder how she feels when she gets her test back and the paper has been bent because the teacher didn't bother to take the staple out while grading it.
I think that it's bachelor number two..the "idiot" thing is just underlining passion mixed with her fear of the real thing.
I actually am reading a book that had me make a list like this about past relationships. Maybe she's reading the same one?
Really, keep looking.
Do not stop looking until the minus side is empty because all the negatives are totally insignificant.
I believe this can happen. It happened for me (and lots of my friends, too!)
If only the writer of this note could read this. Pick #2. He's an idiot, that means you have something immensely defining about yourself in common with him: you are an idiot too. Truth is that I've seen lists like this before and the girls who made them were serious trouble for everyone, including themselves. I wish I could say otherwise, but every instinct tells me that one of these guys is going to wish she'd never narrowed it down! Do NOT open a joint account with this woman!
In high school this might be cute, as an adult it's a real sign of trouble.