October 09, 2009

Granny Called
FOUND by Robin in Vancouver, BC, Canada
I found it on a taxi.
Doctor Jones in dy
Who in their right mind would call their cat "Amanda"?

But she certainly has a point there. Keeping goldfishes in a bowl IS actually far from adequate animal housing.
+ October 09, 2009 01:48 AM +
D in fish playground
she felt sorry for the fish because Jenny "doesn't even play with them anymore"? how do you play with goldfish?
+ October 09, 2009 01:50 AM +
Doctor Jones in dy
Oh, did I jus say fishES?
I'm really really sorry. Really sorry.

How does one play with goldfish? I guess you can't make them jump through a hoop, can you?
But they're damn good at monopoly and poker, I've heard.
+ October 09, 2009 03:15 AM +
Feeling in coherent
Good Lord!!

I hope Amanda doesn't ever think I'm bored!
+ October 09, 2009 07:26 AM +
Feeling in coherent
I meant "sad" not "bored"
+ October 09, 2009 07:27 AM +
kaldonia in At Granny's
Oh and Mom. Don't forget Granny called. She wanted to know if we're still coming over for the fish fry Friday night? Tee Hee
+ October 09, 2009 07:40 AM +
Up way too early in my dark little house
I wonder how she killed them.
Rubbing alcohol in the water? So naughty!
+ October 09, 2009 07:49 AM +
Kris in NJ
This sort of disturbs me. They say animal cruelty often leads to serial murder. Watch out, Grandma.
+ October 09, 2009 08:04 AM +
Librarian in the woodwork

Amanda finally had enough.

Takes quite a few of those little goldfish to fill a girl up, too, but Granny had put such a guilt trip on her about the "Goldfish Murders" (new book title!)

+ October 09, 2009 08:34 AM +
Feeling in coherent
I though up a new cajun main dish
I'm sure that it will make you wish
That I weren't so gruff
'Cause you've had enough
I'm sorry that I killed the goldfish


...OK not my best work, but I'm out of practice
+ October 09, 2009 08:39 AM +
Hiplainsdrifter in South Portland, Maine
Amanda's Goldfish Fish Tacos

I found that these are a great way to get a bit more goldfish into our diet,
plus they taste great. And by not frying the Goldfish, these are pretty healthy,
depending on your toppings. Besides Amanda was no longer playing with them.

8 tacos (change servings and units)


Ingredients
5 Amanda's Goldfish
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 lime, juice of
1 tablespoon cumin
2 tablespoons southwest seasoning
salt
8 corn tortillas or flour tortillas (small size)
cooking spray
Toppings (optional)
sour cream (optional)
guacamole (optional)
minced onion (optional)
shredded cheese (optional)
fresh salsa (optional)
lime slice (optional)


Directions

1 In a nonstick pan, heat over medium high heat the oil and then add the Amanda's Goldfish.

2 Season with half the lime juice, salt, cumin and southwest seasoning.

3 Once that side is cooked, flip and season, cooking till golden.

4 Heat a small pan over medium heat and then spray with cooking spray. Add tortilla, cooking and heating both sides.

5 Fill tortilla with a portion of Goldfish and then top with desired toppings.
+ October 09, 2009 09:48 AM +
The Farker Who Cared in Spring, TX
There was a story about a week ago where a woman in Texas ate her ex-boyfriends goldfish because he would not share them when they broke up.
+ October 09, 2009 09:52 AM +
Night in gale
The Pepperidge Farm Goldfish® aren't smiling anymore.
+ October 09, 2009 10:05 AM +
fooch
I remember when I was a kid and would go to these school fairs. They had the ping-pong ball toss where you could win goldfish. There were these guys one year that I watched: they would win the goldfish then swallow then whole.
In front of all these kids.
I was so traumatized.
+ October 09, 2009 10:10 AM +
we're just two lost souls swimmin' in a fishbowl, year after year
Not to mention they freakin' REEEEK! messy, messy fishies.

I find myself wishing the name on the note was Amber, rather than Amanda.

+ October 09, 2009 10:12 AM +
forever in blue jeans
Oh and when Grannie called she said she was bored in that little room at the home. I'm on my way over there now. Sorry!
+ October 09, 2009 11:06 AM +
Sammy Davis Junior Jr
HPD: mmmm...I am really hungry now
+ October 09, 2009 12:09 PM +
Farmer in The Dell
ught to call them "orangefish," don't you think? After all they're not reall
+ October 09, 2009 01:25 PM +
Joey Stink Eye Smiles
I ate her goldfish with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.
+ October 09, 2009 01:44 PM +
Librarian in the woodwork

Not to mention how disappointed Jenny was with the goldfish in the first place!

Tried to teach them to fetch. No luck.

Tried to teach them to sit or roll over. No luck again.

Tried to get them to come when called. No bleeping luck.

Wow! Getting goldfish to play is harder than it sounds. I think Jenny just got tired of putting all that effort into playing with goldfish and getting nothing in return.

Amanda was doing her a favor.
+ October 09, 2009 02:02 PM +
Shoulda been a Betta Fish in Idaho Falls
...Because I would have played with you, hugged you and loved you every day. Ok Not really but I did have a betta that liked to jump but only when I had food hanging over the bowl and then one day my cat decided she wanted to go fishing...
+ October 09, 2009 03:44 PM +
Stan Flouride in Frisko
Actually, goldfish can be trained quite easily. This is one of several videos available on Youtube and there's a ThinkGeek goldfish training kit available for purchase.
http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=C3031A
+ October 09, 2009 06:17 PM +
Clover in the Lawn
Life is full of regrets.
+ October 09, 2009 06:18 PM +
disco in ferno
ok, off-topic, but does anyone here think that the lace bodysuit and disco pants in the American Apparel ad are a classic look? classically what?
on-topic: my kid's science fair project involved respiration rates of goldfish in different types of water: tap, distilled, creek. Warning: don't use tap water.
+ October 09, 2009 06:29 PM +
greenbluewavynova in a gadda da vida
did she use the pink paper as fishwrap?
+ October 09, 2009 06:42 PM +
orinoco womble in wimbledon burrow
When released into a large body of water, goldfish grow enormous and become what they were meant to be: carp. And they often lose their gold colouring in favour of bottom-of-the-pond sludge grey. Our local park has a pond that is well-stocked with the things...and I've been told by those who know that all them were "donations" and their offspring...people sidle up to the pond and release unwanted pets into the water when they think no one's looking.

I read somewhere there are over 200 permutations of "goldfish" including some with "bubbles" over their eyes and others with "clouds" (excrescenses). One wonders why. They are, as someone else mentioned, smelly and not very bright. I had some at one time and they just sat in the bottom of the tank and ate. The Homer Simpson of the aquatic world.
+ October 09, 2009 11:57 PM +
phyre in the hole
Goldfish aren't smelly. It's their shit that's smelly, just like any other creture's. If you can smell it, you're not keeping the tank clean enough.

As Doctor Jones said, a bowl is NOT a decent home for a goldfish. They should be kept in a cycled, well-aerated tank with at LEAST 20 gallons of water. If that sounds ridiculous to you, consider this: When cared for properly, a goldfish can grow over a foot long and live more than 20 years. Goldfish kept in bowls suffer from stunted growth, among many other problems. Assuming they don't suffocate from lack of aeration or die from disease, they're slowly killed by their own organs continuing to grow inside their stunted bodies until they're basically crushed to death from within.

Amanda probably did those fish a favor.
+ October 10, 2009 01:30 AM +
Beldar, consum in g mass quantities
I love how the O in Mom is a doodly-doot.
+ October 13, 2009 01:18 PM +

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