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November 14, 2006 |
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Stolen Porch Swing
FOUND by Amy Forrest
in Ridge Spring, South Carolina
This sign was posted on a main street bulletin board just a few years ago. I love the last line where the writer warns you to look out for your own porch swing...if you have one.
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Mitosis August 16, 2008 |
Give Craig Money October 01, 2005 |
Bob, the External... December 10, 2007 |
Cocksucker ... July 06, 2008 |
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We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework,
to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles -
anything that gives a glimpse into someone
else's life. Anything goes...
Who would steal a porch swing?
He wrote a nicer note that I would have. Stuff like this ticks me off bad!
An apple cutout? Who could resist! I'd steal it all over again too! Bwahaha!
*gasp* It WAS you, Odd Nick! You've always struck me as a serial porch-swing stealer!!! o_o
~Saki
oh man september 14 is my birthday... i wish someone would steal me a pourch swing
uh-oh, he's on the loose again! my little town had a kid stealing lawn gnomes and porch swings...until his mom found it all stashed in their attic!
thats amazing! a porch swing is such an unlikely thing to steal ... but the apple cutout might have gotten me too.
aw i feel badly this was probably stolen from an old couple that sat on it a lot. haha maybe not.
That's just pathetic. Stealing a PORCH SWING?!?! The lows people have sank to...
Notice the writing. It looks like the person started out writing slow so that it would get nice and neat, then all of a sudden it gets slanty, like they were trying to just get it done. Or maybe thinking about the situation just made them more angry. What do you think?
Writing going from neat to messy in a long-ish paragraph is perfectly normal. I do it all the time. Doesn't necessarily mean anything.
I like this notice because it conjures the image of someone slowly filling their garage with stolen porch swings. Astounding.
Yep I think so too Jess. It is especially noticable at the part about the "Apple cut out". My husband's parent's have a swing.. hrm.. hope someone steals it :-D
My favorite part is "keep an eye on your swing", too! Make sure they are not out after curfew, and sit them down for a talk about who to let swing on you and who not to. And don't give up your bolts, whatever you do! They are what holds you to the porch. If you lose them, god knows where you will end up... or on what kind of porch!
"Thanks and God Bless"
God Bless Swings and those who help look for them.
It's 3:00. Do you know where your porch swing is?
Stealing porch swings from the semi-literate must be the hip new thing for the troubled adolescents of Saluda County.
he probably stole his own porch swing...trying to divert blame somewhere else. like those people who fake kidnappings...bastard!
I admire the nerve of someone who steals a porch swing. It was obviously premeditated...sneaking onto the porch in the wee hours with one's tool kit...an accomplice, getaway car...rather amazing, really!
Tools may not be needed, if - like my parents did - you just get some really big "S" hooks to connect it to the chains. But again, that goes to premeditation, as the Porch Theif would've had to have known that.
I have friends who started using "porch swings" as an (accidental) euphamism for "pornography". Naturally, I can't look at this note without chuckling.
At first glance, I took the last line to mean "Keep an eye on your swing, if you have an eye." That got me laughing.
i have the black sheep family members i could see stealing a porch swing LOL picture this a 6' tall man climbing up on yoru pourch trying to be unseen but his skin looks like snow white has a tan has a dwarfed version of himself following along. srry its a mental image after bad family members its rotton but knowing how clumbsy those 2 are its funny thinking about how they have gotton away with anything they have done so far... wounder if this person ever got her swing back if i ever talk to that side of the family again i will ask lol if they got a new swing but chances of me talking to them probably not likely ;p
I can imagine this is a small town. Large city police would ask why it wasn't chained to the porch. Must be a town where you can keep your doors unlocked. I wanna move somewhere like that.
Here we go again on another time warp to 2006.
Stealing sucks. I know people that had their rocking chairs stolen off their porch. They didn't have apple cut-outs though...
Obviously a hate crime. I fell off of one of those bastards once.