I Know When I’m Wrong


FOUND by Joe Briggs in a dormitory on the campus of the University of Wisconsin-Oshkosh, Oshkosh, Wisconsin

When I was in college, I used to clean dorm rooms in the summer to make ends meet. Other student workers and I would wake up much earlier than we were accustomed to and dread that first week of the summer. We would enter rooms, black garbage bags in hand, and encounter freezers with exploded Colt 45′s and used condoms glued to mattresses. But, sometimes what we found would stop us in our tracks. I found this note attached to a bouquet of flowers that was in the garbage. I wanted to take the bouquet and the note, but I don’t think our boss would’ve liked that. I met my wife while working this job and our inside joke, whenever we have a fight, is for me to end the tiff by saying, “I’m sorry I called you high maintenance.”

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5 thoughts on “I Know When I’m Wrong

  1. Reminds me of the “pair bonding” scene at the beginning of the movie Serial. “Thank you, Martha, for pushing my buttons. For I am an asshole. And being an asshole is neither good, nor bad, it just is.”
    Harvey Holroyd whispers to his wife, “Boy we live in exciting times, don’t we? Gas is over a dollar a gallon, and it’s OK to be an asshole!”

  2. It’s just what a guy would have to say to a girl that actually was high-maintenance, too.

  3. Yeah, because having to run to the florist during finals week to buy a bouquet of flowers when you know in your heart that a simple note should suffice … that’s not a sign that she’s high maintenance. No way!

    Actually, the note writer didn’t write “You’re not high maintenance” what he wrote was “I’m sorry I called you high maintenance.” Big difference. She still is. He’s just sorry he said it out loud . . . because of all the maintenance it is taking to try to repair the rift.

  4. I just re-read this, and it could be taken as sarcasm. “I may be an asshole, but at least I know when I’m wrong. You, however, always think you’re right, and even if you know you’re wrong you’d never admit it. I’m sorry I called you high-maintenance because you will never let me hear the end of it.”

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